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Random question for those eating at Subway.

21 April 2008 12 Comments

Random question for those eating at Subway.Is it just me… Or does anyone else find those “$5 Foot-Long” Subway commercials vaguely pornographic?

I mean I know they’re talkin’ about sandwiches… But they don’t have to be talkin’ about sandwiches if ya’ know what I’m sayin’…

They even follow cheesy porno plot lines… Well what plot lines there are to porn anyway. You have your standard chick getting pulled over by a cop, your innocent Asian schoolgirl, your stewardess ready to initiate you into the mile high club, and your weather girl… Ok so maybe the weather girl doesn’t fit the porno mold but everything else sure as hell does.

Especially the Asian chick, that part is so freakin’ hot… Because she’s all like. “Oh no… Someone help me. I’m just a sweet, innocent Japanese school girl, and this monster is going to ravage me… It’s not going to hurt is it? It’s not too big right? and Godzilla is all like… “Grrrrrrr… It’s huge baby! And you’re gonna take it… You’re gonna take it all… Every… Single… Inch… Grrrrrr!” And then she’s all like…

Ummmm… Yeah. I really think I need to get laid, because fuckin’ Subway ads are now starting to make me horny…

Speaking of Asians and food, if I were Asian I would get three cats and name them…

Breakfast…

Lunch…

And dinner…

Just to see the reaction on peoples’ faces…

I’m just sayin’…

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12 Comments »

  • Me said:

    Your knowledge of the porn genre is astounding! ;)

  • Hungry Mother said:

    I usually reserve my Subway meals for days when I’m traveling. Last week, I was in a Subway and saw a facsimile of the feast. I flashed back to looking at Hustler centerfolds.

  • Hungry Mother said:

    Sorry, here’s the feast.

  • Iron Pugilist said:

    Never tried cat before. Dog tastes like pork with a texture of beef. Spicier, the better.

  • tequila mockingbird said:

    i’m not sure what kind of stretched out whores youve been fucking, but christ, a foot long is waaay too big.

    i’ll pass.

    unless it has non fat mayo for lube.

  • Mike said:

    Any guy that has been in a locker room will tell you that there’s no way Asian chicks could EVER take a foot long. At least, if they’re cooch is matched up to their counterparts ding dong.

  • Just Sayin... (author) said:

    Me… Yeah well… I’m a guy, it’s kinda’ what we do.

  • Just Sayin... (author) said:

    Mother… Tasty yes! Titillating… The jury is still out.

  • Just Sayin... (author) said:

    Iron Man… You mean it doesn’t taste like chicken? I thought everything tasted like chicken…

  • Just Sayin... (author) said:

    Mockingbird… If I were packin’ a foot long I’d be a millionaire porn star coke fiend with a name like Buck Naked… Not a dorky internet blogger with a name like Just Sayin’… I’m just sayin’…

  • Just Sayin... (author) said:

    Mike… Way to embrace the stereotypes Mike! The water is kinda’ nice here in the hate pool isn’t it?

  • Iron Pugilist said:

    That’s fantastic thing to say, Mike but I don’t think you’ve watched a lot of interracial porn.

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