That may be the first time anyone has ever said that to me!
Sep 2nd, 2008 | By Just Sayin... | Category: Correspond, Converse and Confess | Visited 292 times, 5 so far today
Unfortunately our toll free number at work is very… Very close to that of the Department of Children and Family Services for some undisclosed state, that I can only imagine, based on the accents of the people calling, is located somewhere south of the Mason-Dixon line, where Nascar isn’t just a sports franchise… It’s a religion. And Bubba is not just your uncle… He’s your cousin too.
photo credit: The G-tastic 7
As you can imagine this can tend to create some annoying, albeit occasionally amusing exchanges between our employees and an assortment of nefarious scumbags ranging from dead beat dads, to drug addicted welfare collecting moms. They are always angry… They are always rude, and they are always ready for a fight.
You get the feeling that they are well aware that they are dirt bags, or at least considered to be, and are pretty well resigned to being treated as such. I’m assuming this comes from years of dealing with beauracracy and attempting to defend an indefensible position…
I guess…
From what my mom tells me anyway…
It’s pretty tough to explain how you lost custody of your 3 month old baby because you went on a crack binge for three weeks and ended up leaving junior at a crack house as collateral. So they’ve, for the most part become accustomed to being treated like shit!
I know… I know… My kinda’ people right?! So this morning the phone is ringing and I grab it…
“Thank you for calling (blank) how can I help you?”
“Uhhhhhh… Whatchoo’ say?”
“How can I help you???”
“Dis’ mus’ be da’ wrong number!” “Dis’ be da’ numba’ I call fo’ my benefeeits don’t get cut?” “I gotta report my baby daddy social security so ma’ benefeeits don’t get cut!”
“Ummmm… No. We’re a (blank) company, I’m afraid I can’t help you.”
“So who I gotta call?”
“I’m sorry I really wouldn’t know, as I said we’re a (blank) company.”
“Dis ain’t DCFS?”
“Ummmmm no (laughing audibly now) this is a (blank) company.”
“Damn… I thought so. You was too nice.” *click*
I set the receiver back in the cradle thinking… That may be the first time I’ve ever heard that phrase… Well the first time it’s been directed at me anyway. So thank you! Thank you un-wed teen mother, for making my day! If you only knew the real me… If you only knew.
Oh… And by the way. If anyone out there knows the father of Bristol Palin’s baby personally, you may want to tell him that I think she may be looking to turn his ass in!
I’m just sayin’…