The naughty folks at AshleyMadison.com have struck again.

In the wake of Oprah’s new series “Why Men Cheat,” the dating site specifically designed to help married people cheat on their spouses has announced a brand new promotion…

Members who purchase an Ashley Madison “Affair Guarantee” Package and don’t experience an affair to remember within three months will receive a complete refund…

So, I know this is supposed to be a a new promotion and a really novel marketing scheme but I think I recognize this business model.

I mean essentially you’re guaranteeing sex… For a price. Right?

Ummmm… I hate to break this to you, but that’s not a new marketing scheme, that’s the oldest profession known to man! Which kinda’… Well it sorta’ makes the employees at Ashley Madison pimps…

photo credit: andronicusmax

That is just absolutely…

Well I mean the very idea… It seems so…

Honestly… The whole thing just sounds so…

FREAKING AWESOME!!!

But you’ve gotta’ look at the fine print. I mean the folks over at AshleyMadison.com are promising you an affair to remember… They’re not necessarily promising that you’ll remember it fondly… If you catch my drift.

Obviously you’re picturing something like this, or this, but who’s to say you won’t end up with something like this or even this?!? Hell… In that case you’re better off sticking with the wife…

I’m just sayin’…