Movie lovers Suresh Joachim and Claudia Wavra today emerged as the winners of the Netflix Popcorn Bowl event after 123 hours and 10 minutes of continuous movie watching. Hosted by Netflix, the world’s largest online movie rental service, the grueling movie marathon began on October 2 at 12:00 p.m. ET and concluded today at 3:10 p.m. ET establishing a new Guinness World Record for most consecutive hours spent watching movies.

Honestly… I think I probably hold the un-official record… I’ve just never been monitored doing it.

The naughty folks at AshleyMadison.com have struck again.

In the wake of Oprah’s new series “Why Men Cheat,” the dating site specifically designed to help married people cheat on their spouses has announced a brand new promotion…

Members who purchase an Ashley Madison “Affair Guarantee” Package and don’t experience an affair to remember within three months will receive a complete refund…

So, I know this is supposed to be a a new promotion and a really novel marketing scheme but I think I recognize this business model…

So… The Doritos brand announced it is once again giving complete control of its Super Bowl ad air time to its fans.

But this time, the snack chip brand is raising the stakes… In addition to airing one self-made Doritos ad to a captive audience of millions, Doritos will give that talented winner $1 million if their 30 second spot takes down “the big guys” and becomes the first-ever consumer-created commercial to claim the No. 1 ranking in USA TODAY’s annual Ad Meter.

This gives me a great idea… Doritos sex tape!!!

So Meg and I are watching some reality cooking show on the Food Network, which is being filmed in New Orleans…

During a commercial break she asks nonchalantly… “New Orleans??? Isn’t Orville Redenbacher from New Orleans?”

“No… No” I say, “I think he’s from Indiana.”

She furrows her brow and thinks for a moment mumbling under her breath… “Who… Who am I thinking of???” and then with a self satsified smirk she states triumphantly… “Oh… It’s that Sanders guy. The Kentucky Fried Chicken guy… He’s from New Orleans!”

“Ummm… Are you serious”…

photo credit: Afroswede
At this point in our evolution, weren’t we supposed to be habitating the moon, owning a flying car and residing in a house that cleans itself? Isn’t that what we were promised? Isn’t that what the new Millenium was supposed to bring? Not global warming, the shadow of terrorism and nuclear proliferation…
I was feeling seriously cheated until yesterday… Yesterday while picking up cat litter (God is my life depressing… I have become the crazy cat guy.) at the grocery store I saw it. I saw the future… …

photo credit: j.reed
I went to the grocery store today, and as I was perusing the thousands of choices available in the personal hygiene aisle, not the least of which being anti-perspirant or deodorant, or perhaps some mutated combination of both…
I noticed that men’s body spray has merited it’s very own section.
That’s right men’s body spray has entered the big leagues as far as toiletries go… No longer is it relegated to a single shelf above the Mennen Speed Stick Shower Fresh!
Nuh Uhhh…
It has an entire bin of shelves …

Love her or hate her… You have to admit Paris Hilton has become quite the pop culture icon.

According to her detractors Paris is a wealthy party girl who likes to pose for photos and dance on tables… A vapid, self involved, celebutante, whore who lives off of her parents money and has become famous for… Well for being famous!

In other words… To them she represents the cheerleader, or the popular girl they wished they were, who was worshiped by all, and who taunted and ridiculed them in high school, re-inforcing their insecurities and making them feel fat and un-loved…

Is it just me… Or does anyone else find those “$5 Foot-Long” Subway commercials vaguely pornographic?
I mean I know they’re talkin’ about sandwiches… But they don’t have to be talkin’ about sandwiches if ya’ know what I’m sayin’…
They even follow cheesy porno plot lines… Well what plot lines there are to porn anyway. You have your standard chick getting pulled over by a cop, your innocent Asian schoolgirl, your stewardess ready to initiate you into the mile high club, and your weather girl… Ok so maybe the weather girl …