So I’ve been puttering around here for a while. No real direction in mind. No solid plan, it’s just been a hobby of sorts. More importantly it’s been a place to vent, and blow off a lil’ steam. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed it immensely and if it goes no further than that I’ll still enjoy it. The thing is…

I wanna’ be a rockstar! I’ve always wanted to be a rockstar… Since as far back as I can remember, and since I have no musical talent. Blogging is gonna’ have to do (Lucky for me you don’t have to have any writing talent to blog!).

So starting now I am declaring to the blogosphere - “I AM A BLOGGING GOD!”

You know that feeling you get after you’ve been anally raped by a group of cross dressing, bondage loving inbreds named Dwayne and his brothers Darryl, and his other brother Darryl who make the freaks from The Hills Have Eyes look attractive??? No… Me neither…

But I wish I did… Because I’m sure that feeling is better than the one I have after visiting Probably Sucks…

I think I would rather watch my grandmother go ass to mouth with Ron Jeremy than read another post by the king of all douchebags…

Look… Normally I’m a risk taking, fly by the seat of my pants, fun loving kinda’ guy, and we’ve all been having a great time here lately, surfing the interwebs and what not.
However… In light of recent events I think we need to slow this roller coaster down and talk about something very important to all of us…
That’s right, I’m talking about sex…
Wait… Wait… No I’m not, I’m talking about internet safety, right, right internet safety. Forget about the sex thing…
Well unless you’re interested, then e-mail me… …

I don’t know if you’ve noticed or not…

But most of my readers tend to be of the female persuasion. Now I’d love to think it’s because I am such a stud, and draw women like bees to honey… Or more appropriately, like flies to shit.

However every once in a while it strikes me as odd…

Let’s be honest there are a lot of crappy blogs out there…
With over 12 million American adults currently maintaining a blog and over 120 thousand new blogs being created every day! That’s a whole lot of viral videos and LOL cats.
Seriously… I’ve surfed from one side of the internet to the other, and I’ve seen a lot of strange stuff. But I’ve never seen anything to make me believe that there’s any blog better than mine. There’s no mystical blogging field that controls MY destiny.
So I’ve compiled a …

Don’t get me wrong…
I have some of the greatest readers in the blogosphere… And in a blatant attempt to curry your favor I can say without hesitation that I love you all.
Your thoughts, your comments (Mostly the off-color ones.), and your one-liners are why I keep spewing forth this mental diarrhea…
With that being said… I have to say that none of you have risen to the level of genius, nor fallen to the depths of despair that this guy has.
I know… I know…
It’s just another info-mmercial spoof. …

If you’ve never heard of Twitter, than either you’ve been living under a rock for the past 6 months or so, or this is your first trip down the information super highway. Either way you should count yourself lucky.
According to the folks at Twitter, they are offering a service for friends, family, and co–workers to communicate and stay connected.
According to me Twitter offers a form of micro-blogging masturbation… A way for the “look at me” generation to complain about their job, their friends and their sexual conquests while promoting …

If you found your way here by accident… Hi! Welcome to this little shit hole on the web that I call home. If however, you found your way here by following a link from another page and can’t seem to find what you were looking for… I’m working on that.
Now that I have returned from the Outer Banks of the blogosphere I’ll be re-posting some of the more popular pieces. I was going to try to restore the entire database but I’ll be honest… I’m too lazy, it’s too hard …

If you are upgrading your blog to the latest version of WordPress, and you end up corrupting your own database… You might be a douchebag.
See… I decided to upgrade to WordPress 2.5 last week, so I began the three step upgrade process with a sense of anticipation and unbridled enthusiasm for all of the fancy-schmancy bells and whistles the new platform would have to offer.
The thing is… The problem with getting swept up in a wave of enthusiasm is… Sometimes you can lose your proverbial boardshorts… In hindsight I probably …