The naughty folks at AshleyMadison.com have struck again.

In the wake of Oprah’s new series “Why Men Cheat,” the dating site specifically designed to help married people cheat on their spouses has announced a brand new promotion…

Members who purchase an Ashley Madison “Affair Guarantee” Package and don’t experience an affair to remember within three months will receive a complete refund…

So, I know this is supposed to be a a new promotion and a really novel marketing scheme but I think I recognize this business model…

I really think Megan Hauserman is gonna’ win I Love Money, and not just because I am completely and totally obsessed with her either, although I am…

As an aside… Megan, contact me! I want an interview! And don’t pretend like you don’t read me either… It’s pretty obvious you’re a publicity whore, and we both know you have a Google alert set up for your name!

But I digress… If we’re being honest she’s going to win because her bikini clad body is the only reason anyone watches the show…

Ok past! Listen up!

I’ve decided to face you head on… No more running, no more hiding, no more procrastinating! It’s time to… Well it’s time to grow up.

I know…

I know it’s really sudden. Believe me I was comfortable with our old relationship too! It was great… Really it was! You saddling me with a ton of emotional baggage, and me shrugging responsibility for any of it and blaming everyone except myself…

Good times past… Good times…

Lately I’ve been feeling really jealous of the fact that everyone else seems to have a life… So much so that I’m actually contemplating putting myself out there once again…
That’s right…I am talking about dating.
So I figured I should brush up on my list of interests and hobbies, because let’s be honest… I need all the help I can get.
The thing is I don’t really have any hobbies or interests… Well none, outside of hating most everyone and everything. So I’ve compiled a list of 11 things which …

Ok… Picture this. You’re at work, minding your own business, doing whatever it is you do and you just happen to answer the phone because hey… You’re that kind of person… You’ll actually pick up an overflow call even though you don’t have to… You’ll pick it up just because… And on the other end you hear…

photo credit: E|NoStress|
“Hi (insert your name here),
Is my brother around???”
Immediately you recognize the voice as none other than your ex… Not just any ex… But theeee ex, the one that ripped your …

You can always tell a woman is becoming comfortable in her relationship when she starts wearing mismatched under garments.
When the relationship is new and exciting you’ll never catch her in a mismatched set of bra and panties. She’s always color coordinated, usually with something lacy, maybe a nice matching floral print or pink hearts accentuating her oh so lovely unmentionables.
Let’s face it… When a relationship is new women rock their underwear like Victoria’s secret models…
Fast forward several months into the relationship…
There she is… Your Victoria’s Secret Model, standing …

I’m kind of an asshole. Who knew?
I’m just sayin’…

I hate telling people the truth, and then watching them get embarrassed for asking…

photo credit: TheAlieness GiselaGiardino²³
I’m just sayin’…

Continuing the stereotype theme from this post, I’d like to move on to the women. Actually, I’d like to move on, around and under most women.
Well… Except the fat ones, and the old ones, and the ugly ones… And definitely not any combination thereof… Like the fat, old, ugly ones. Unless I was really, really, really drunk. Or if there were some special circumstances, like it was Tuesday, or any day that ended in a “y” for that matter…
But I digress… For the purposes of this post when …

Some people collect stamps or rare coins, while others collect folk art or blown glass…
Me… I collect stereotypes.
My hobby is the accumulation of generalizations, opinions and stereotypical views along gender lines, racial profiles and religious beliefs. Like most Americans… I hear them, process them and I repeat them, in an attempt to garner more acceptance and respect amongst my peers.
Ironic isn’t it?
Anyway… The one thing I’ve learned in the course of my hobby is… Most stereotypes have at their core, a kernel of truth. Granted they are overly exaggerated …