You know what I miss about having a steady relationship?

It’s not what you think either, it’s not the sex… Well not just the sex anyway.

No… What I really miss is having someone to run errands with… Seriously… Especially around the holidays. I miss having someone to go to the mall with. I miss having someone to mock the other shoppers with. I miss having someone around to share the hell that is retail shopping during the holidays…

Don’t get me wrong…

Alright groupies mark your calendars! I will be celebrating the sixth annual Day of the Ninja this December 5… Which means… Well… It means you will also be celebrating the sixth annual Day of the Ninja this December 5…

As my evil minions you will be required to dress up like a ninja, act like a ninja, and participate in officially sanctioned ninja-related activities…

The Day of the Ninja was created in 2003 as a ninja counterpart to the popular International Talk Like a Pirate Day, celebrated every September 19 by Johnny Depp loving gay-tards who like to dress up in puffy shirts and…

Ok… Seriously… What is the fucking deal with Lego?

Were all you Lego geeks so emotionally scarred from being forced to play with your uncle Gary’s “Mr. Winkie” as children that you haven’t matured emotionally beyond the age of nine?

Or is it just that your you’re mildly retarded and brightly colored bricks can hold your attention for hours on end???

Either way… It’s enough already!

Grow the fuck up! You’re starting to…

Would you like to hear George Bush’s postmortem analysis of his own presidency, before it’s over? Get ready for Bush and more Bush in the ultimate presidential exit interview spoofs! “Dubya” impersonator James Adomian stars in “Face to Bush”‘ a series of all-new video shorts co-created by comedy all-star Bob Odenkirk (Mr. Show with Bob and David).

Thanks to the probing questions of series host Mary McQueegle, fresh off the infomercial circuit, “Face to Bush” tackles a variety of important subjects including…

So I’ve been puttering around here for a while. No real direction in mind. No solid plan, it’s just been a hobby of sorts. More importantly it’s been a place to vent, and blow off a lil’ steam. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed it immensely and if it goes no further than that I’ll still enjoy it. The thing is…

I wanna’ be a rockstar! I’ve always wanted to be a rockstar… Since as far back as I can remember, and since I have no musical talent. Blogging is gonna’ have to do (Lucky for me you don’t have to have any writing talent to blog!).

So starting now I am declaring to the blogosphere - “I AM A BLOGGING GOD!”

You would think that all the good scandals would be happening at like The Soap Network, or Playboy After Dark… Think again!

Apparently all the juicy scandals happen at tween networks… First there was the the star of Disney’s “High School Musical” Vanessa Hudgens doing amateur porn for her co-star…

Then the star of Nickelodeon’s “Zoey 101″, and Britney’s younger and obviously sluttier sister Jamie Lynn Spears ends up pregnant!

Now Adrienne Bailon has some naked pics floating around cyberspace…

Be honest…

If you’re father was the public face for a cult that believed an extraterrestrial named Xenu brought billions of aliens to Earth 75 million years ago in DC-8-like spacecraft…

Then stacked them around volcanoes and killed them using hydrogen bombs so he could steal their souls…

Yet he accidentally left remnants of their spiritual essence behind to form around people in modern times, causing them spiritual harm…

Let’s be honest America… (Wow I think I just channeled the spirit of Bernie Mac), no matter your particular political affiliation… There is one thing we can all agree on.

It’s been a long hard 8 years…

So what better way to throw off the shackles of a poorly run, short sighted and wholly unpopular Bush administration than an Obama inauguration party?

The Georgie Is Outta Here Party In A Box! contains everything needed to celebrate Bush’s departure from the White House including…

What do you get when you put America’s Next Top Model producer Tyra Banks and Beauty and the Geek producer Ashton Kutcher in a room together and ask them to create a reality competition with the perfect mix of beauty, back stabbing and bitchiness? True Beauty of course…

True Beauty will feature six women and four men living together in a Los Angeles mansion under the impression that they are competing in a beauty pageant-like reality competition series in which they will be judged solely on their looks…

I know what you’re thinking… Another gratuitous celebrity boob post?

This is just a blatant attempt to drive traffic to you’re blog by getting your readers to ogle celebrity fun bags isn’t it???

Ok… So ya’ got me, but honestly… Do ya’ really mind?

As a society we’re obsessed with celebrity boobs. Nude scenes, nip slips and stories of augmentation are guaranteed front page fodder for every taploid and gossip rag from New York to LA, and this blog is certainly no exception…